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Dear Annie: My mother made me feel like I was never good enough and I was relieved when she died

DEAR ANNIE: How does a daughter reconcile with the emotional trauma of being scapegoated by a narcissistic mother? I faced years of not being “good enough.” I was shunned from family events, and honestly, I felt relieved at my mother’s passing.
No surprise — I was excluded from her will. Over the years, I realized that the real breaking point was being rejected from family holidays. Is going “no contact” a necessary step for healing, and how can I fully embrace the freedom that comes with the end of such a toxic relationship? — Broken but Healing
DEAR BROKEN BUT HEALING: I’m so sorry for the pain you’ve experienced. Being the daughter of a narcissistic mother, and being shut out from family events, is truly painful.
Being excluded from her will is hurtful, but as you’ve realized, the real pain came when she rejected you from family holidays. That rejection was about more than money; it was about wanting to feel loved by your mom. Recognizing this is an important part of healing, as you can focus on your emotional well-being over material concerns.
Surround yourself with friends and support groups as you grieve the relationship you always wanted and never were able to have with your mom.
Send your questions for Annie Lane to [email protected].

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